Cut It
Or obliterate it altogether.
But boys will be boys. Will be boys.
And my husband, is a boy. (still a boy)
He always has gadget fads that he swears will not last. But they keep morphing into some other fad, that I want to scream to him: Yes honey, they do not last but they always, always get replaced with something else that take your time away from us!
Like now, it is his PSP and his Tekken game. He plays it every chance he gets – when waiting for an appointment or before the start of a meeting, in the bathroom, in his office (I bet – but he owns it so I think it is okay), in my hospital bed (when I was recently hospitalized), downstairs in our house when my children and I are having playtime and how-are-you-time upstairs, in our bedroom when the lights have been dimmed and my baby boy who is trying to sleep could not sleep because he is distracted by the eerie disco lights and slightly muted sounds from the PSP game.
I could go on.
Please allow me.
A few months ago it was Fairy Tail, the series, and before that it was Naruto. He would spend hours (hours) way into the early morning just to get his Fairy Tail and Naruto fix that I wanted to burn – and I mean set fire – to those discs really bad. I mean maybe he spent 18-hour days of doing just that – watching – just to (albeit very excitedly) get through 176 or so episodes.
And then years before today, there were his bass fishing trips via Playstation 2 that again lasted way into the night and into the early morning just so he can catch big fish after big fish after big fish (but there was always the bigger fish!), and there were his Yugi-oh cards (he spent a lot of money on those!). Again, I could go on.
None of it ever made us any money.
And sometimes, because he is too distracted, he becomes forgetful or he fails to listen.
But I guess, boys will be boys.
I told him if he had only spent those hours doing something productive like painting (my boy is a talented painter), or designing something (and a designer extraordinaire), or thinking of other businesses (and a businessman with sassy moves and savvy concepts), we would be mega-millionaires by now.
(To his credit, despite his distractedness, he shows me the money and still comes up with darn good ideas.)
So I told him, if it does not make us more money, he should cut the time he does it in half. Please. (I said please.)
I did not say obliterate because I did not want to crush his spirit, or make him cry.
And boys need some downtime sometimes.
Cause I think I can live with a little of the games, but only a little. Because add that to his sports – rowing, weights, running, basketball – when can he spend time with us (and I mean with him being really there? Body and spirit?)?
And I am not liking it.
Hear it honey, I am not liking it.
I am not sure if he will comply. Thing with men is you cannot force them to do anything that they do not want to do, or anything that is not their idea, or anything that cuts out their fun.
Well, here’s the best of luck to me.
(and if you are in the same situation, here’s a good luck to you too)
Article by Issa. Photo by Danvic Briones. Copyright 2011.
Website: www.YouWantToBeRich.com
Email: issa@youwanttoberich.com
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I tried to make my addiction to games more productive by putting up an iOS app reviews site: http://appsized.com.
Prior to my review blog I spent quite a bit of money on buying prepaid iTunes credits for my game/app addiction.
Putting up the review blog did two good things: 1) cut my expenses significantly on these games and apps since now I get most of them for free; and 2) helps me earn even just a small amount of money thanks to donations (I haven’t explored putting up paid ads on my site yet).
It’s not always a bad thing, if you ask me, if it contributes indirectly to a feeling of motivation or productivity, or even better, a way to earn extra income 🙂
@Enuhski Good for you! I actually broached the subject of making apps for the iPhone to him (trying to channel the “time spent” to something more productive than open-mouth watching) since tech interface fascinates him (and he is a genius too in a lot of ways) but i don’t know – he was not so receptive to it. But hopefully I will find another way, or just ignore him when he is so engrossed so I will not be too bothered! More power to you and to your website 🙂
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Hi Carmina! Thank you for your email to me, for your comment and for the link above. I am sure hubby will like you (and I will mention you to him), probably even love you. I am sorry for the bitter taste in your mouth – but no, I am not really sorry – because bitter tastes make for good lessons – maybe for you, maybe for me. Despite the title of my article, my whole intent, and in fact my cry was – more than money – for hubby to have time for my children (forget me). Time for them before the precious years disappear, and those years will disappear fast. We have a newborn – he is 9 months now – and our only time to be with him is at night. But hubby comes in when he is already asleep, still flushed from his downloaded videos and his games. Please do not get me wrong – I too love Naruto – and before the advent of baby, would join hubby in his nightly escape to that enchanted, funny land (I have written about Naruto too). Again – it is okay, but too much of a good thing is no longer okay (please note I said and acknowledged he needs downtime too). I can adjust if it is for making money, i.e., he has deadlines, etc. but I assure you, he will hear me roar too if that is taking too much time away from us, especially the children. It is funny. My journey started with money but – if you look at the progression of my articles – I am slowly finding out – and you are right – money is not everything. If you really listen to the tenor of this article that left a bitter taste in your mouth – the cry, despite the title, is not money, but time, not games, but simple pleasures through being with our children. You and I – we do not agree, but I think down the road we will meet somewhere. Again, thank you.